If you asked me a couple of days ago what the most annoying sound in the world was, I would have told you a car alarm. As it turns out, I was close but mistaken. It's a car horn. Not a friendly beep beep or a taxi honk but an endless, painfully loud horn. The red car parked directly in front of our house had its horn stuck for about an hour...at 3am...and the owners weren't home. Eventually, it stopped (who knows why) and the entire block went back to sleep. It happened again a few times throughout the next day and again at 5am Saturday morning. Needless to say, there were several strongly worded letters crammed under each windshield wiper. The final straw came at 5pm on Sunday as dinner was put on the table (literally). We went outside to see if we could find out who the owners of the car were and surprisingly, the entire street was standing outside. It was a mob. An angry mob wearing slippers and Sunday night pajamas ready to identify the owner and tear them limb from limb. After 45min we called the cops and they said that they had received many calls about this already and had dispatched a cruiser. The Coppers kindly drove up 20 minutes later to tell us there was nothing that they could do. Hmmm, really? I'm pretty sure they could tow it...or jimmy the hood open...or at least hand out earplugs for gods sake!

One hour and forty five minutes later a doe-eyed teenage girl showed up with keys and barely even knew how to pop the hood let alone stop the horn from blaring. As soon as that hood was up, some guy and I were in there like a fat kid on a smartie. I was wielding a multi-tool like a butterfly knife while he was armed with some menacing looking pliers and put our heads into the engine, sacrificing our eardrums for the greater good. After hacking at a few clamps we managed to unhook the car battery which was a huge accomplishment considering I can barely open a plastic pack of normal batteries. A resounding cheer interrupted the brief moment of silence (with a few threats on the owners life yelled from balconies) and I proceeded to cram the battery feeds into the bowels of the vehicle so they can never be found again. Now if I could only put a barbeque together I would be a grease monkey.