I’m pretty sure that I just got my hair cut by a gorilla. He fit the general description anyway – massive, hairy and mainly just grunts for communication. This is also the opposite of what most hairdressers I’ve frequented are like so you can imagine my concern.

I desperately needed a haircut and as I was on my way home from “Quantum Of Solace” I thought that I would just pop in to some new place in the CBD. I fell for the oldest trick in the book of walking in and saying “Is there an opening right now?” and having a beautiful girl tell me “It will just be a second if you’d like to have a seat”. I should have known immediately that Bigfoot in the corner wasn’t there to provide security. Sure enough two minutes later, “Pretty Young Thing” was working a pencil into her hair while answering the phone and “Gigantore” had his mitts on my head looking like he was about to crush a coconut.

I immediately regretted the decision to get a spur of the moment clip but was too cared to get up and leave because not only was this guy the approximate size of a rhino but he was also near razor sharp scissors. I accepted my fate (I’ve had a good life), squeezed my armrests like a first time flyer and hoped that by the time this was over I still had my head still attached to my head. “Tiny” reached into his back pocket and whipped out a pair of scissors like a friggin’ butterfly knife and started at me. I wasn’t sure if he was pulling my hair out or indeed cutting it but my head was bobbing back and forth like a manual driving instructor on day one. I was still hoping for the best/praying for a quick death when I decided that I should probably look death in the face like a man. As I unscrewed my eyes and saw myself in the mirror I realized that not only was I alive but I had just received a fantastic haircut. This not-so-gentle giant knowingly peered back at me in the mirror and said, “You like?”.

Since I was mentally noting something about a judging a book’s cover the only words I could muster up were “I like”.